Sillies
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*disclaimer* if you are Jensen Ackles (or his pretty, pretty wifey), I'm sorry I objectify your body, but I'm not going to stop. You're just too much. :)


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I feel like Jody was thinking: I look like I just got the shit beat out of me but you lost at LEAST two pints of blood and you’re fine. You giant ass moose. 

19 hours ago on April 22nd, 2014 | J | 2 notes

I would just like to know what the actual point of Monday is supposed to be without Rick and Morty.

1 day ago on April 22nd, 2014 | J | 5 notes

closetshipping:

autocorrect changed “orcrist” to “orchids” so here’s a lame flower pun comic. 

2 days ago on April 20th, 2014 | J | 774 notes

"Bees, signifying immortality

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and resurrection” 

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1 week ago on April 15th, 2014 | J | 3 notes

I earned my yellow belt!!!! YAY!!!! I’m so excited!!!!! :D

1 week ago on April 15th, 2014 | J | 2 notes
1 week ago on April 14th, 2014 | J | 332,782 notes

Emperor’s New College

tokyodoll13:

English Majors:

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Architecture Majors:

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Music Majors:

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Engineering Majors:

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Mathematics Majors:

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Theater Majors:

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Latin American Studies Majors:

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Linguistics Majors:

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History Majors:

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Religious Studies Majors:

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Law Students:

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Chemistry Majors:

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Women & Gender Studies Majors:

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Anthropology Majors:

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Sociology Majors:

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Philosophy Majors:

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Geology Majors:

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Economics Majors:

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Classics Majors:

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Government Majors:

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2 weeks ago on April 8th, 2014 | J | 115,502 notes
godzilla3092:

xopachi:

skwinky:

lntruding:


Have you ever been to earth?
On earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain:
You’re an idiot.
Let me further explain:
Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layerslengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a cilantro cavern.
Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY.
When you eat a burrito, you don’t stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans can’t usually dislocate their jaws, and I’m not a fucking pelican. But you must think that’s how it’s done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito.
And guess what else, player? You probably can’t guess anything, because I’m pretty sure you’re just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, here’s what:
Humans also don’t eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS I’LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SECOND.
Nope.
My experience was more like HEY BEANS IT’S JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND I FOR A MINUTE UNTIL I CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG I’M IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE IT’S NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET.
You built this thing like a fucking pack of LifeSavers.
And don’t even fucking think I’m about to open this shit up and re-engineer your nonsense 90 degrees. I ALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THAT’S HOW I DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITH A BURRITO THAT’S BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE.
What’s that? I should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DON’T WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DON’T WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR CAN.
I just want a burrito.
In conclusion:
You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys.



UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID “JUST EAT IT WITH A FORK”:
A fucking fork?
I DIDN’T ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO SALAD.
If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork, THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION TEN SECONDS LATER.
That’s like buying a car and having them hand you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL.
Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. They’re called fucking HANDS.
A fork. My god. I haven’t cried since I was six, but I’m fucking sobbing now.
People eat burritos with forks?
God is sorry he made us.
(Source)


I always need this on my blog.

I can’t be laughing this hard in the morning. 

This is the single greatest rant in the world.

godzilla3092:

xopachi:

skwinky:

lntruding:

Have you ever been to earth?

On earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain:

You’re an idiot.

Let me further explain:

Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layerslengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a cilantro cavern.

Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY.

When you eat a burrito, you don’t stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans can’t usually dislocate their jaws, and I’m not a fucking pelican. But you must think that’s how it’s done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito.

And guess what else, player? You probably can’t guess anything, because I’m pretty sure you’re just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, here’s what:

Humans also don’t eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS I’LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SECOND.

Nope.

My experience was more like HEY BEANS IT’S JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND I FOR A MINUTE UNTIL I CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG I’M IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE IT’S NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET.

You built this thing like a fucking pack of LifeSavers.

And don’t even fucking think I’m about to open this shit up and re-engineer your nonsense 90 degrees. I ALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THAT’S HOW I DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITH A BURRITO THAT’S BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE.

What’s that? I should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DON’T WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DON’T WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR CAN.

I just want a burrito.

In conclusion:

You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys.


UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID “JUST EAT IT WITH A FORK”:

A fucking fork?

I DIDN’T ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO SALAD.

If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork, THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION TEN SECONDS LATER.

That’s like buying a car and having them hand you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL.

Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. They’re called fucking HANDS.

A fork. My god. I haven’t cried since I was six, but I’m fucking sobbing now.

People eat burritos with forks?

God is sorry he made us.

(Source)

I always need this on my blog.

I can’t be laughing this hard in the morning. 

This is the single greatest rant in the world.

2 weeks ago on April 8th, 2014 | J | 46,474 notes
sapphire1707:

Mosquito Valley, Nuuk - Greenland by northbound

sapphire1707:

Mosquito Valley, Nuuk - Greenland by northbound

2 weeks ago on April 7th, 2014 | J | 28 notes
2 weeks ago on April 6th, 2014 | J | 314 notes

Heads up:

I’m going to be out of the country next week (SO MANY PICTURES WHEN I GET BACK) so I won’t be around. BUT if you’re interested in submitting for the project (details here) or you know you just wanna say hi, whatevs, I won’t be able to answer you until I come back, so sit tight because I’ll get right on it upon my return and after I deal with my jet lag. 

:3 

1 month ago on March 20th, 2014 | J | 1 note

shingekinokyojinheaven:

dragon-in-a-fez:

shingekinokyojinheaven:

i told my mom that god has killed babies in the bible and she didn’t believe me so i searched it up and to my surprise

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wait

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what

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there’s a list???

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JESUS FUCKING CHRIST

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in conclusion god is an asshole

for comparison:

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okay well I mean ten murders is still bad though so

wait

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damn.

god gambles with your souls pass it on

I’ve been saying it for a while (one of my friends was worried the car we were in would be smited (smote?) off the road because I called him a jackass once. Want more sources? [x] and [x]

1 month ago on March 20th, 2014 | J | 58,368 notes

lord-kitschener:

thegingerbalrog:

my-fandom-life:

dismantlerepaired:

whereismystrawberrytart:

hikingnerd:

timelordpillbug:

follovved:

amerlcanapparel:

when she says she doesn’t send nudes

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when guys objectify women and expect them to send nudesimage

when someone asks you about your nuclear plans for russia

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When Russia sends you nudes

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1 month ago on March 20th, 2014 | J | 861,739 notes

flo-prato:

ellendegeneres:

Ellen had to do a huge favor for a good friend of hers during the show today. We’d like to thank Michelle’s husband for taking the time to talk with us!

my first thought before I saw Obama was “oh my god, Ellen is friens with michelleakin

1 month ago on March 20th, 2014 | J | 331,467 notes
1 month ago on March 20th, 2014 | J | 19,940 notes